Good WI :o)

Just a quickie this morning (I have my first order of ironing to do this morning yay!!!!)!

So I have lost the 3lbs that I gained last week! This is good but I now need to get below the 14 stone mark so my mini goal this week is to loose at least 1lb!

Chow for now

Hxxx

Thank god its all over!

Hola!

I am so glad it is sunday night, I have had busy weekends for about the last 5 or 6 and finally they are all over for the forseeable future so i can now completely concentrate on WW!  I haven't been too bad over the weekend really but it was charlie's birthday party on sat and we had a wedding reception to go to and today was a family party for charlie so its been food all round but I have eaten much less that I would normally!  So now this evening I can breathe a sigh of relief and tomorrow crack on with good healthy eating and guarantee myself a loss every single week now!

ALSO I have great news I have finally got a job!  It was the weirdest thing at school on thursday I got chatting to one of the mums  Ihave never spoken to before, she runs a little home ironing business and she was telling me that she had had enough and didn't want to do it anymore and to cut a long story short she is giving me all her clients!!!  I couldn't believe it I know ironing is really crappy work but I so desperately need the money that it is just so great, i am so excited i can do it at home and around the children which is just perfect!  So i am having coffee at hers tomorrow so that she can show me how she runs things and then she can hand over to me as soon as she likes, she just said she doesn't want to do it anymore and because she doesn't need the money she can just give it up!

Anyway back to WW I am raring to go so will update you how I get on this week, fingers crossed for a good result at WI on thursday!

Chow baby!

Hazelxx

WI total bloody disaster!

Morning All

Totally fucking disaster had WI this morning and I gained 3lbs, I am so upset the two mini goals that I achieved last week have gone totally down the toilet and were a complete waste of time but I only have myself and my pure greed to blame but I am so sick of this I have been playing with the same 10lbs for 7 months now AAAAHHHH!!!!!

Anyway lets look on the bright side, I was talking to one of the teachers at school this morning who comes to my class to be weighed by me and I give her lots of support via email throughout the week to help her because she struggles and we were both moaning about weight this morning and she said how lovely I am, so that was NSV no.1.

I then went for a coffee to see one of my closest friends who I haven't seen for a few weeks and she said I really look like I have lost weight - I don't think I do but she was really genuine about it so that was NSV no.2!It is my sons 7th bday today so I am gonna have some cake later and then tomorrow I am back full force I HAVE to get past the 10lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Sorry to rant everyone!

Hazelxxx

Back in control baby!!!!

Soooooooo I had a sneaky peak this morning and have gained a whopping 3.5lbs since Thursday, now I am lucky in that I pretty much know that most of that will be water retention from all the shite I have eaten the last few days so I am fairly confident that if I bust a gut I can get the scales to read better than that by Thursday morning, so today I have got myself back in the driving seat and have stuck rigidly to my points, I have also drunk less diet pepsi and have had a few cups of peppermint tea to help with the bloating!

So PLEASE GOD let me loose just half a pound this week PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

Hazelxxx

Heavy weekend!!!!!!!!

Morning All!

Blimey I have had such a heavy weekend foodwise, I haven't counted a single point and feel sick to my stomach, literally! We went to some friends for dinner on Friday night which was lovely but I ate until I could barely move which I haven't done for so long so I felt really rubbish for it! Saturday wasn't too bad my sister came and stayed and we cooked dinner but it was homade burgers and homemade chips so that wasn't too bad. Then Dave and I went to the Gadget show at the NEC in birmingham with our friends so we stopped for breakfast on the way, had a cake mid morning had a subway for lunch and then Dave and I had a takeaway when we got home last night because the cupboards were bare!

BREATHE...................

Anyway I am not feeling despair or even guilt because of now weighing at home, it is amazing the stress has completely gone and I feel so much more in control, I feel confident now that I can have a good 4 days and get at least a STS result on thursday so it's all gooood!

Right feel better now I have got that off my chest, off to school (on foot!) we go!!!!!!

Hazelxxx

1st "at home" WI today!

Hi All

Had my first "at home" weigh in this morning (have decided not to WI at meetings anymore) and I have lost 1.5lbs yay!!! I am well chuffed this takes me to 10.5lbs in total so I now only have 3.5lbs to get to my first stone.

I have also reached a couple of mini goals today I wanted to loose 4lbs by 25th April which is now done and I have also done my 5%Yay!!!! Feeling good today, hope everyone else is too!

Hazelxxx

Back on track

Hiya

Haven't been on here for a while, last week I gained another pound and was really struggling but this week I have lost 2.5lbs yay taking my total loss back up to 9lbs!

Bad news though that my Leader is leaving which is devastating because I just love her, she has been so kind to me over the last few months!

I may leave my meetings now and go it along just using the support from the website.

Will post again properly soon.

Hazelxxx

DIY WI!

Well I didn't make to WI yesterday being so poorly so I jumped on my own scales which are fairly accurate and I Had put on 1lb again but that's ok, I have got back on track properly today and feel so much better for it, my spirits are lifted and I feel like I can do this again.

Off to see Lemar in concert in brighton tomorrow with my sister and her best friend which I am really looking forward to, I have loads of things on for the next 4 weeks or so, so hopefully this will allow me to stay positive and in a good mood!

Oh and I also I had a lovely email from Laura in my hour of need which was so nice, so thank you Laura!

Hazelxxx

oh dear oh dear oh dear!

So I have been really poorly AGAIN! I am so sick of this cycle, I came out with an awful cold last wednesday and was really quite poorly over the weekend, I had my WI on thursday and had gained a pound but I deserved it so didn't feel upset about it but instead of cracking on to ensure a loss next thursday I hav pigged and pigged and pigged!

I am going to put my WW clothes on this afternoon and have a sneaky peak to see what the damage is and then my plan is to go food shopping in the morning while Bobby is at playgroup and stocl up on some filling foods so that while I know I will gain this week I can ensure a good loss next week.

This cycle of loosing weight, ilness, bingeing and gaining is so boring and is making the weight loss so slow but I have got to keep at it otherwise god knows where I will end up!

Back on it

So my bingefest is over and I am back on track today, points are going well and I did the school run on foot this afternoon the same as yesterday afternoon.

Here's hoping for a sts so that I am not set back too far and can really get cracking.

The sunshine is beautiful today and really helps with the old bad moods!!!

so tired of myself!

Totally blown it today, need to give myself a kick up the arse, am sick of this cycle of blowing out between thursday night and Monday! I want to get back on track properly so I can start loosing properly again and feeling good about myself again!

Not feeling good!

I am feeling really down on myself today, I have had a bad weekend foodwise, we had some friends for dinner on fri, my sister for dinner last night and i just fucked up for the sake of it today!

Dave took some footage of me with our camera this afternoon and immedaitely played it back to me and i could have cried, i just look like a hippo, my face is proper chubby and my arms are huge, I felt so down it has ruined the end of my weekend!

So back on it tomorrow and here's hoping for another loss even if it is just half a pound!

I am such a loser!

WI tonight and I lost another half pound yay!!!!!!!!! Will try and step it up this week so that I can loose more than half!

I am sooooooooooooooo happy!!!!!!!!!!!

inch loss island!!

That's where I am living today! I am so amazed and sooooooo excited! Its my WI tonight and I am expecting at least a STS if not a gain so I decided to measure myself and I am so excited that I have lost 6.5 inches all over! That's 2 inches off my waist, 2 inches off my hips, 1 inch of my upper arm and 1.5 inches off my thigh!

WOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BMI

Ihave just updated my ticker to show my loss so far and its really nice to see my BMI going down! Mine is so dangerously high that it's almost better than the actual weight loss to see it going down!

Still on track today!

Back on it!

Right I am back on track today, I haven't managed to go under points but that's fine I have stuck to my 22 points and had lost of good filling foods and I have drunk a few glasses of water which I don't normally, so fingers crossed I will STS!

Lost it!

I have totally lost the plot and I just can't believe it after doing so well for so long! We had chinese on saturday night, I had a binge last night and I have just had a huge binge today, I HATE myself, it is going to be soooooo hard to get back on it now, if I had just stuck to it over the weekend I wouldn't be feeling like this, I HATE feeling like this, it is not a nice feeling to not like yourself very much!

WI Yesterday

Lost half a pound. That makes it 9lbs in total, 1 pound to go until my 5% goal and 5lbs till my first stone!

Phew!

Lost 1lb, thank god for that! I am going to keep going to get another loss next week! This means I have lost 7lbs in 2 weeks and 8.5lbs overall. This is going to be slow but the time will pass regardless!!!

D-DAY!

Its WI tonight and I am dreading it! I have been so spot on with all my points this week, but last week I forgot to take my pill one night and it has brought on a bleed the last few days, I thought it was over yesterday but its back again today and I am really bloated, I will be soooooo upset if I have gained!!!

I'll let you know the results later.

Hxxx

Feeling good today!

Afternoon all (well Laura and Vicky coz I think you are the only ones who read this lol!!!)

I am feeling good today, my hormone bloatedness seems to be subsiding so feel better in myself. I have had a good spruce of the flat today, put a chilli to cook in the slow cooker and have made some zero point soup! oh and I made some sugar free jelly with lemonade yum yum!!!

I intend to have a pamper tonight and do my nails and sort my hair out and stuff and then I will be wearing my new jeans tomorrow!

It's my WW classes tomorrow, I helpout weighing during the first half of the first meeting and then I sit in on the meeting, and I then I weigh throughout the whole of the second meeting. I really enjoy it, it's nice to weigh other people and talk to them about their problems instead of always focusing on mine, and because I am in the zone at the moment I feel I can give advice to people who are struggling!

So I haven't had a single SP on my home scales this week so I have no idea whether I am in for a loss, I really hope I am I will be so happy if I have lost just a pound!

So wish me luck ladies!

I will report back tomorrow evening!

Hazelxxx

Clothing sizes.............

are bloooooooooming ridiculous!!!!!!

A few weeks ago in desperation I bought a new pair of jeans from Dorothy Perkins and had to resort to a size 20, I have to say they were big around the bum and thighs but I have a really big tummy (thanks kids!!!!!) so a size 18 was just that bit too tight.

Anyway I HATE them they look awful so I went into Marks this afternoon to have a look at theirs and took several different styles and sizes into the changing room. Well one pair of size 18 did up but I was spilling out all over the place so opted not to go for them, another size 18 I couldn't even get done up, so I ended up buying a size 20 that are still too tight in the tummy department but the legs look great so I will just have to continue wearing long tops until I loose a few more pounds!

Clothes sizes can be so soul destroying but I decided to just ignore the size label and get what looked the best!I am 5ft 1" and weigh 14 stone 3lbs and it just seems that people who weight more than me can get into smaller sizes e.g. a 16 or 18 I JUST DON'T GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!Anyway just wanted to moan and share!

Hxx

It could have gone pete tong - but it didn't!!!

So I have had a really tough day foodwise today but have resisted bingeing ALL day! It started with a really poor night's sleep which instantly makes me want to binge and just feeling generally miserable (hormones etc.).

So normally I would ditch the diet in an instant and eat whatever Icould lay my hands on to binge away the feeling of misery.

BUt..... I am so desperate not to gain this week that I decided I was just going to have to "feel" the misery and deal with it, so that is just what I did! I reckon that might be the first time in years and years and years that I have done that and i am so pleased that I did nad you know what it wasn't that bad really!

To have a binge would have satisfied me in the first instant but then would come the guilt, the bloatedness, the sickness and in the morning a major food hangover!

So i have proved to myself and hopefully all of you that it is possible to be down and have a bad day without reaching for the biscuit tin, i am not saying that I am now a saint because I know there will be times when this may not work but for now I am pleased as punch!!!!

Hxxx

Someone pinch me

Hiya

Just a quickie! I feel like someone needs to pinch me because WW is going so well for me, I know its early days and I have only had one good WI so far but I am on target for my points each day and it feels great, I don't feel at all bloated and its a really weird feeling not being constantly stuffed with food!

Please let it continue!!!!!!!!!!!

7.5lbs down and only 62.5lbs to go!

Hxx

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I lost 6lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes that's SIX pounds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm Actually Doing it!

I have been away for a while and thought about giving this up but I think I will just log in from time to time for an update rather than do it every day!

So I had been on a downward sprial for a long time but everything has now changed!

For a start my WW Leader asked me to be a helper and I was sooooo chuffed! I did my first meeting last week weighing people and I totally loved it, i can't wait to do it again tomorrow!

So doing that plus having a chat with my Leader and also everyone on the WW forum, I am now on my 6th day of counting points and I haven't gone over once and i feel AMAZING!!!!!!!!! I am confident there will be a loss at my WI tomorrow and I am determined to keep with it this time! I am even going to the cinema tonight and have allowed 5 points for some popcorn!!!!

So things are looking up and I really think I might get to goal this time and maybe by next summer which would just be so great!

Watch this space!!!!

Hazelxxx

27th Jan 2009 - i made it!!!

I can't believe I did a whole day yesterday of sticking to my points! I honestly thought I would never be able to do it ever again (dramatic I know!!!) and would just be fat forever but it was great to wake up this morning without a food hangover and feeling sick to my stomache! I feel confident that i can do it again today so I am really praying that this is the start of things to come, I so would love to get 2 stone off for the summer, I would still be really overweight but would probabyl be in a comfrotable size 16 which would be great!

So I am having salmon again for lunch which I love and then a WW lasagne for dinner which I am actually looking forward to!

Check in again later to let you know how it's going.

Hx

26th Jan 2009 - on the up

Well today I feel a tiny bit better, not swinging from the chandeliers better but a bit better all the same! So I managed to do a weeks worth of food shopping at tesco while bobby was at playgroup and did it in a record 40 minutes!

I feel today could be the day that I stick to my points and go to bed feeling happier about myself. This is how my day is panning out so far:

Breakfast:

Couldn't eat breakfast this morning as felt a bit rough when i woke up

Snack:

packet of wheat crunchie crisps 2p
Not good I know but they are actually fairly low fat and I fancied them so hey ho

Lunch:

Salmon fillet 3.5p
Watercress 0p
Sweet chilli dip 0.5p
30g (dry weight) rice 1.5p

So total so far is a respectable 7.5p

I intend to snack on fruit later and maybe a piece of WW toast with some peanut butter (good GI).

It goes without saying really that when you feel better in yourself mentally and physically healthy eating is much easier!

Right chow for now I will update you later to let you know if I have made it through the day!

Hxxx

24th Jan - Its all gone pete tong!

Well its all gone tits up today, have eaten loads and feel terrible, but lets not dwell there's always tomorrow.

Hx

Time to get on with it

Right, it is time to get on with this, I can keep harping on about how hard this is and giving all the reasons why I am overweight still but at the end of the day all the time I waste I continue to be overweight and putting more on and more.

Time to face facts I am fat and need to be slim to have a long and healthy life so HAZEL GET ON WITH IT!!!!!!!!!! Counting points isn't so hard it allows me control the amount of food I consume and lets face it I won't have to do it forever if I can shift the excess weight.

SO LETS DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hxxx

23rd Jan 2009 - I DO MAKE MYSELF LAUGH!

I do talk some shit you know - I stand by what I said earlier but who am I kidding when i say I can loose weight without dieting, it's impossible so I will continue with WW and get this weight off!!!!!!!!!!

23rd January 2009 - The Great Weight Debate!

Well here I am, I have been really unwell since last thursday with a virus and a really horrible cold so I missed my WI last week but dragged myself there last night and had a lost 1lb without even trying but....................................

This morning I watched the Wright Stuff (my fav daytime programme) and on the panel were Paul McKenna, Anne Diamond and a Doctor whose name escapes me. They were having a debate about why we are so fat (as a nation) and every single one of them said that dieting without a shadow of a doubt makes you fat, they were saying that every time you diet you end up putting all the weight back on plus extra. This is SOOOOOOOOOOOO true about me! I have been dieting since I was about 20 when I had first moved in with Dave and put on about a stone (that made me 9 stone in those days!!!) and Mum told me I was looking a bit lardy so should go to her slimming club with her, which I did and lost a stone very quickly and easily but that was it from then on my obsession with food began and the yo yoing started it was a total nightmare!!!!!!!!!!!!

When i was about 24 I became really overweight (11 stone 11lbs in those days) through a long bought of anxiety and some depression and had set a date for my wedding to Dave so enrolled in WW which gave me a new and fresh approach to dieting with their points system and it took me 18 months to loose about 3 and a half stone, but of course immediately after I started having babies which brought me extreme anxiety through a kind of post natal depression and my only solace was food and so continued my battle with eating, guilt and dieting.

I can't beleive how miserable this has made me all these years, I go to WW every week and feel positive and motivated for about an hour after and think that WW is the greatest thing ever but I truely think I am kidding myself. I KNOW what to eat, I KNOW how to live a healthy lifestyle what I DON'T need is to be spending £20 every month to step on a pair of scales that are the same as mine at home for someone to help me fuel my obsession with food and weight.

At the WW meeting last night, the whole meeting was spent with most people expressing how difficult they find dieting and then talking about how yummy WW food products are - ARE THEY KIDDING!!!!!!!! diet food is utter SHITE it is filled with sweetners and sugar to compensate for the lack of fat and generally tastes like artificial cardboard.

I am SICK of dieting and want to stop, I didn't get to just under 15 stone from purely being greedy and lazy (although that is a major part of it) Igot here through my obsession with dieting, it has taken over my whole life, I am sick of it and so is Dave, I just want to eat healthy be responsible for my portion control, become physically active and see the pounds come off without the stress of counting points, calories, sins, fat content, carbs and all the rest of that bollocks and without the stress of a weekly weigh in which is done by aa lovely leader but who is 10 years younger than me and has not had children and works full time and has only dieted once, this sounds like me 10 years ago oh how easy it was back then!!!!

I do not want to be like my mum who bless her still yo yo diets now in her 50's I want to be fit and healthy and slim for me and my children so that I can live a long and healty life.

Tonight we have chicken pie, potatoes and veg for dinner, I know that I can have this if I have a small porition of the pie and not have to count it!!!!!!!!!!!!

God I am out of breath here but I have to make a lifetime decision here, I think WW is great for people who are experiencing it for the first time but ultimately it makes me totally miserable, I only want to think about food when I am eating it and not every minute of every day thinking about how many points I have left and what I caneat for those points.

PHEW!!! Anyway that is how I feel today, so I may cancel my membership and see how I go and put the £20 to good use somewhere else.

Chow for Now

Hxxx

14th Jan 2009 - Poorly but sticking with it

So I have woken up poorly this morning, raging sore throat aching limbs and generally feeling rubbish, HOWEVER I parked the car at playgroup and walked to school which is only 10 mins but even so every little bit counts, and then walked back to playgroup to drop bobby off. I then went to town and walked around for an hour and a half and eventually found a half decent pair or jeans, they are black and a size 18 and just about fit round my waist, but if I had got a size 20 they look ridiculously big around my legs so that's something I suppose!

Anyway I have had 2 slices of nimble toast and peanut butter for breakfast for a total of 4 points, I will be having 2 more slices of nimble toast for lunch with tuna, sweetcorn and mayo for a total of 5 points and then for dinner a salmon fillet with watercress, sweet chilli sauce and rice for a total of 7 points so that's a total of 16 points for my meals which leaves me with 6 points to play with so i will have a think of what I can have for that. I was all ready to give up this morning and stuff my face all day but then I thought about it rationally so I am determined to stick to it all day, I may not necessarily eat too many filling foods but I will make allowances for how crap I feel!

Anyway I am off for a 10 min lay down on the sofa before I go out to pick bobby up and then I intend to do the same until school pick up!

Anyway sorry to bore you all!

TTFN

Hxxx

13th Jan 2009 - tomorrow

Right I am going to tackle this one day at a time - I will only think about one day at a time.

So tomorrow I will:

* Stick to my points and eat filling foods
* Buy a new pair of jeans and not worry about what size they are
* Dye my hair, do my facepack and have a bit of a pamper
* Not worry about exercise as I am not feeling too well at the moment
* Write at least one positive thing in my blog tomorrow

So that is all I have to do with regards to my weight - the jeans and the pampering will help being overweight a little bit more bearable while I am loosing weight and is something I should do once a week.

Onwards and upwards!!!!!!!!

I am the only one who can do this so I am going to stop moaning, stop being lazy and stop being greedy!!!

Hxxx

13 Jan 2009 - complete failure

Well I am at a complete loss, i am totally ridiculous and a complete failure, I had a peanut butter sandwich this afternoon, then cheese with my spag bol and garlic bread and two pancakes with choc and cream to finish I am a pig who has no self control AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

13th Jan 2009 - the jeans have given up

well the hole is now sizeable enough for everyone to notice it so I am going to have to wear them one last time tomorrow for the school run and then go straight to dorothy perkins to buy a new pair, I just hope I can still get into a size 18, I don't weigh anymore than when I bought this pair but I feel bigger!!!!!!!

13th Jan 2009 - Winter Blues

I have got a serious case of the winter blues, I have blown my "diet" the last couple of days but am back on track today so I'm not too worried about that, I am going to make some more zero point soup which will keep me going if I get really hungry!

So I really need my haircut but I can't afford it, I think I may spend a tenner on some hairdye today to see if I can give myself a little bit of a boost, but I also desperately need a new pair of jeans, I have one pair of size 18's that I wear every single day because nothing else fits me and I wanted them to see me through to the first couple of stone of weight loss because then I will be able to get into my 3 pairs of size 16 jeans that are almost brand new and are sitting in my wardrobe, but alas they have a hole in them which is only going to get bigger so I'm going to have to buy a new pair!

God its all money, money, money!

I am craving sunlight it is so gloomy outside!!!!!!

Still one day today of eating good food will make me feel better by tomorrow.

Hx

11 jan 2009 - Lets try again!

Right I was going to wait to do this until tomorrow but I am having such a crap time that I need to do it if not for sympathy for some words of encouragement from you all!

Right my points have all gone out of the window I have totally screwed up this weekend because I had a major row with my husband which we have now recovered from but it totally ruined my "diet" so I am now feeling extremely bloated, sick and really fed up, I can't believe I have screwed up my first weekend, i really need to learn how to handle food when things go wrong in life because things go wrong ALL the time don't they so it has to become something you deal with and NOT by eating everything in sight!

Anyway I have LOTS of walking planned this week so I am praying for a loss of at least a pound at my WI on thursday, all I wish for is some consistency I would love to loose most weeks even if its just a pound because that way its worth doing isn't it!

Anyway my post that crashed was much longer than this but I don't have the energy to say it all again, so I am off to clean out my snails (oh the joy) and hope for a better day tomorrow.

Nite nite

Hxxx

11th Jan 2009 - the WORST weekend!!!

oH MY GOD!!!!!!! i have just written my whole entry and it bloody crashed when i posted it!!!!!!!

I have no time to do it again today so I will do it again tomorrow

Sorry!!!!!!!

9th jan 2009 - So Great!!!!

Well I had the dreaded weigh in yesterday and as predicted I have gained 5lbs, thank god though it wasn't more, i saw someone on the WW forum that had gained 12lbs over Christmas! I think I would have cried if I had done that!

Soooooo I am so motivated its untrue, I am determined to do this, I had a whole faultless day yesterday of following my points, I even managed to bank 2 points for the weekend, I am concentrating on eating filling foods which is now the new focus of WW and it totally worked yesterday I even ate grapes and an apple and as I really am not a fruit lover it was a great achievement for me!!!!

I am still doing well today and am not hungry because of the foods I am eating and am making a curry tonight with a naan bread and although the whole meal with be 11 points the rest of the day is so good I can afford it!

I haven't had a chance to make the zero point soup yet so I intend to do that later so that I have something hopefully yummy to see me through the weekend if I get desperate!

I feel so much better already I don't feel bloated and I am so much looking forward to being slim I can actually visualise it now which is great!

I did a bit of walking yesterday although not loads but hopefully as long as its not raining (yes I am a fair weather walker!) I will get loads in next week!

Oh I have also joined my leader's Easter Challenge, we had to pay a pound if we wanted to join and the challenge is to loose a stone by Easter, there are 14 weeks till then so that only requires 1lb a week and the winner gets a prize, I would so love it to be me so I m going to really go for it. I am prepared to accept that there may be bad days along the way but I don't want them to affect my "weight loss journey" so I am going to try and keep them to a minimum!

Anyway wish me luck and I will keep updating you on my progress, when I can work out how to add photos to this I will put some up and take updates every now and then to see if you can see my changing shape!

TTFN

Hxxx

7th Jan 2009 - Fresh start tomorrow

So I am ready for tomorrow, I have written out my food plan for tomorrow and I can't wait to start! I will be driving to my friend's house in the morning to walk to school and then walk onto playgroup where bobby is having an induction session that I will be staying to and then walking back, so although it is not too far to walk its better than nothing!

So this is short and sweet tonight but I will write in full tomorrow especially after my weigh in to let you know how its all going!

Wish me luck!

Hxxx

7th Jan 2009 - almost back to normality!

Charlie is back to school and I have been out of the house today YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I felt awful when I woke up this morning, I felt totally sick from what I had eaten yesterday and I was so tired I wanted to cry but by the time I had been up for a bit and had a coffee I felt elated to be getting out of the front door!

So I did the school run, I really wanted to walk but Charlie was very reluctant so I gave in this one time and drove! Then I came home and tidied up, wrote my shopping list and went off to tesco where I bought lots of good food for me to get back on track tomorrow and some naughty bits for me to eat today (ridiculous I know), I bought the ingredients to make a zero point soup from the WW booklet which is butternut squash and red pepper so I am going to make that and tomorrow and hope that it is delicious!

SO I am back to WW tomorrow and I can't blooming well wait! I know the gain is going to be awful - at least 5lbs on - but I am ready to take it on the chin and get going.

I watched the very interesting documentary on Clare Sweeney last night and made the decision that some form of exercise has got to play a part in my weight loss journey so I have been talking to my friend Natalie about it and she suggested that we play badminton once a week which I would really love to do, combined with 3 days of school runs on foot and half an hour 3 times a week on the WII fit I reckon I will be feeling pretty good after a few weeks!

I can't wait to get on with this now, tomorrow is the absolute starting point for me!

Hxxx

6th Jan 2009 - it only got worse!

God I wish I hadn't started this blog before my first weigh in because it makes it look like everything in my life is just doom and gloom but I promise it will get better after my weigh in on thursday night!

So today has just been the pits! Dave very kindly arranged for a courier to come today to collect a package from him - a faulty digital photo frame he is returning - and so I had to wait in for him to arrive. My plans for the day had been to go to tesco and then to the park for a walk this afternoon with charlie still being off, anyway the time is now 17.15 and I am STILL WAITING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UNBELIEVEABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SO MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I have just called Dave to inform him that he needs to pick up Macdonalds for tea (not food in here at all literally because I have been unable to go to tesco) I know I am being just so terrible but I really don't care right now!!!

I feel like I am going out of my mind, I haven't stepped out of the front door since Saturday I tell you thank god Charlie is back to school tomorrow because one more day of this I may just scream!!!!!!!!!!!

Hx

6th Jan 2009 - AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

God I feel so fat today already! I was laying in bed at 8am this morning feeling sick to my stomache from being so hungry so I have started my day with 2 poached eggs on toast and a large mug of coffee but now I feel completely bloated and so so fat I am dreading getting dressed because I know that I am going to look awful today!

AND i had a dream about lasagne last night - what the hell is that all about?! Anyway I shall be buying that for dinner tonight cause Charlie really loves it!

I feel totally in limbo at the moment I just want thursday night to hurry up and come so that I can go to my meeting to feel fresh and inspired - my leader is great - and then I am determined to loose 1lb a week which means 52lbs gone this year which will then mean I will only be about 15-20lbs away from goal, how exciting to think that if I loose 52lbs I will weigh 10st 4lbs god I will be a complete skinny bean!

I WILL DO IT!!!!!

I am gonna get the WII fit out today I think just to do a little bit on it and then I want to start using it properly for some exercise as there is no way I can afford the gym so with that and walking to school as much as possible surely its got to make a little bit of difference!

Anyway onwards and upwards!

By the way I am so chuffed I managed to get out of bed before 9am today even though there was no school run and I am now off to get dressed and do my face and that will be the first time I have done that before 10am probably since the end of the school term last year!!!!!

Hxxx

5th jan 2009 - the day is nearly over!!!

Well my day didn't improve much but it was bearable! We didn't go out anywhere in the end, it was too cold and I wasn't sure Charlie was up to it so we just stayed in and I pottered while they played, i spoke to the GP abour Charlie and we decided that its just a virus but he advised to keep him off school for 3 days! MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!! If his rash has gone by tomorrow night he is going back on Wednesday I NEED SOME LIFE BACK!!!!!!!!!

So my eating hasn't been too bad today considering how bored I have been, I had a chicken and coleslaw sandwich in the end for lunch then a few chocolates this afternoon out of the quality street tin and then fishfinger, chips and beans for dinner and I have just had a few more chocolates. I am still bored though and would really like something nice to eat for that very reason but its tough really cause there is nothing here!

My plan tomorrow is to go and do the weekly food shop in the morning and then if we are all up to it a gentle walk in the park.

Wish me luck!!!!!

Hxxx

5th Jan 2009 - day 5 - When life gets in the way

God where do I start!!!!!! My intention for 2009 was for everybody to be well and healthy after about 2 months of illness in Nov and Dec 2008 and to be tracking every day but everythiong has just gone out the window!!

Charlie became ill on Saturday with a terrible sore throat and huge tonsils and glands so I was really fed up and went straight out to tesco to buy chocolate and lemon meringue pie and cream and completely stuffed my face but justified it to myself by telling myself that it was saturday and I deserved a treat (WHAT!!!!!!). Then yesterday was even worse, Charlie woke up with a terrible viral rash all over his body and face and was really quite poorly and Dave woke up feeling just as bad so I began the day with a coffee and a twix and it just set the path for the day and I ended it with a big fat curry!

Now the question is why do I do it? When I overeat it is usually because I am either stressed, tired or bored and I eat because I always think it will make me feel better but it NEVER NEVER does! I HAVE to stop doing it, it is just madness I feel terrible this morning, really really tired and just totally fed up and I know its due to what I have eaten (as well as dealing with sick children). So I am going to try again today, I have had marmite on toast this morning, I intend to have a ham sandwich for lunch and fishfingers for dinner all of which will be within my allowance.

I think I will also go for a short walk this afternoon just to get some air cause god knows the boys and i need it! It doesn't look like I will be walking to school anytime soon this week with Charlie being poorly, even if he goes back tomorrow I don't think making him walk would be very fair but I intend to start next week I would like to do the school runs on foot at least 2 or 3 days per week.

I need to tackle my tiredness and lack of energy too, if Charlie goes back tomorrow I intend to get up at 6.30 and jump straight in the shower to wake me up and I would like to do that everyday and save any extra sleep for the weekends, I don't think I have got out of bed before 10 these whole holidays and I hate it, it just makes me more tired!

Anyway I am waffling now, I'll check in later and let you know how the day has gone!

Chow for now

Hxxx

3rd Jan 2009 - total disaster!

Well it didn't take long, I have had a disasterous day eating wise, my day was ill planned and I ended up being stupidly hungry early evening before my dinner and threw caution to the wind and ended up eating twixes (yes plural), crisps and had cheese on my pasta with some garlic bread! I am such an idiot but I still refuse to beat myself up about it, my first official weigh in for 2009 is on thursday next week so I will keep doing the best I can until then to limit the damage that was done over Christmas, if I can get away with just a couple of pounds worth of gain since my last meeting I will be happy!

We ended up not going to the house today and spent a pretty miserable day indoors, I am hoping tomorrow will be a bit more jovial!

On a brighter note though yesterday my friend Donna who does WW with me gave me a huge bag of clothes she no longer wants so I have ended up with at least 10 new tops hanging in my wadrobe that all fit perfectly and it was a joy to be able to go and take my pick when I got dressed this morning!

I have 3 pairs of fairly new size 16 jeans hanging in my wardrobe all of which fit me early last year so I would love to be able to get into them some time soon, maybe by Easter because I really don't want to have to buy anymore in size 18 so here's hoping!

In fact maybe I should stop hoping and take is as given that I will loose weight this year!!!!

Oh funny little story to end with, while I was queueing in tesco this evening there was a very slim glamourous lady in front with perfect hair, make up and nails who was waiting while her husband packed the shopping away and I noticed that she was snacking on cherry tomatoes, I chuckled to myself due to the fact that I was chomping at the bit to pay for my multi pack of twixes so that I could stuff my face!!!!!!! Who knows maybe this time next year it will be me with the tomatoes!!!!

Hxx

3rd Jan 2009 - TATT!

Tired all the time (TATT) that's me, how is it possible to sleep in until 10.30 (on the sofa while the kids watched a film!) and still be tired on one hand I am dreading having to get up at 6.30am on Monday and on the other am looking forward to getting back to some normality!

So I have started today with some marmite on toast, something I haven't had for years and I quite enjoyed it! Dave is having a big fat pizza tonight so I am going to have some pasta with courgettes and mushrooms and maybe some onions with salad cream mmm... my favourite kind of food!

We have an exciting day ahead clearing the last of our stuff out of our repossessed house, but we will be so relieved when it is done and we can close the door on that place for the very last time!!!

Well I'd better go and get Dave up seeing as he has not surfaced yet!

Hope you all have a good day (all 2 of my followers he he!).

Hxxx

2nd Jan 2009 - so far so good part II

Well it was going so well until I got extremely hungry due to the fact that I am still up at midnight! Dave (hubby) and I have been clearing out some crap from the wardrobe and we are still going so I have given in to my hunger and had some french bread with peanut butter, not good I know but I am not upset about it, I just need to learn from these things and make allowances for the future!

So a minor blip but not a failure as far as I am concerned and tomorrow is another day so I can be better then!

Night night, even though you are all probably in bed which is where I should be!!!

2nd Jan 2009 - so far so good!

Well I am on day 2 and both day 1 and 2 have been a great WW success I have managed to stick to my points allowance for two whole days in a row yay!!!!!!

I woke up feeling a bit miserable and subdued this morning after being on a bit of a 2009 high yesterday but thankfully this didn't affect my hunger and I was not tempted even once to eat over my allowance. I began my day with 2 poached eggs on toast and have figured that eggs definately keep you fuller for longer but I am conscious of the fact that you shouldn't eat too many eggs so I will only do that for 2 or 3 days of the week and try to stick to porridge or cereal for the rest! I also had a great roast dinner tonight cooked by my loving husband and it was lovely, and really bulked out with loads of veg.

I have to laugh at myself though because I was laying in bed late last night watching a film with no points left and I was starving and every single advert seemed to be food related it was like torture, I couldn't wait to go to sleep just so that I could wake up to eat breakfast!!!

So I have been contemplating the coming week today because everything returns to normal on Monday with my eldest son going back to school on Monday and my husband back to work so my daily routine resumes which is great on one hand but on the other during a normal "working" day I suffer with hunger big time between 4pm and dinner so I need to really figure out a way to deal with this! I am looking forward to being able to walk to school though (weather permitting) and I would like to get to the point where it becomes the norm to do so and not a chore!

Anyway this blog seems very boring at the moment but I will try and be a bit more exciting as I go on!

Chow for now

Hxxx

1st Jan 2009 - Day 1

Hello All

Well I have been an avid follower of Weight Watchers for about 10 years or so now, I had great success in the beginning loosing 3 and a half stone for my wedding, I weighed 8 stone 13lbs, my BMI went down to 21 and I was a size 8 (I am only 5ft 1"), then I started having babies (2 in total) and I now weigh 14 stone 8.5lbs and I don't even want to know what my BMI is, on a good day I slide into a size 18 on a bad day I squeeze myself in!

Anyway my family and I have had a terrible 2008 and I have been playing at WW again since September and lost 10lbs in total before various illnesses and bugs and finally Christmas where I have now lost a total of 2lbs hahaha! So today is the first day of the rest of my slim life, I will reach my goal by Christmas 2010 and this year I intend to really go for it and get fitter and healthier at the same time!

I got the idea of this blog from someone else on the Weight Watchers website forum so I though why don't I do it, not so much for everyone else to view but for me to keep a good record of my weight loss journey which will be particularly helpful if I am having a "not so good" day!

My WW meeting and weigh in is on a thursday night so I will record each weigh in on the day and hopefully will be able to record a loss each week! I have 70lbs to loose in total to get to where I want but I may change this goal towards the end if for example at 50 or 60lbs I feel fine!

So wish me luck!

Much love

Hazelxxx